The longest journey we take as human beings is from our head to our heart.
Unknown
Dear Amazing You,
Believe it or not, being a girl is not easy for any girl, but by practicing and improving your positive self-talk and patients with yourself you can and will become who you truly are and BELIEVE IT.
Life as a girl, teenager, female is very complicated at times, especially when it comes to body image. Our community of females and males for that matter, are so caught up in social media, models in a magazine, ads on television and so many more untruths, that we get lost in our negative self-talk and belief that what we read, see, and hear are truths rather than simply someone else’s beliefs and ideas of beauty.
The good news is that you can and will, with practice and guidance, begin to see the falseness of the information out there and you can and will turn your negative mindset into a positive one where you can believe that you are a one of a kind, unique and amazing person, and gain the self-confidence you need to help you feel less anxious, less sad and more resilient when it comes to life as a girl.
Will it be easy? No, it won’t, but it will be so worth it. You deserve to be happy, healthy, and full of life because life for a girl should be full of self-love, adventure, confidence, and happy days.
So, let’s begin because the sooner you see how AMAZING you are the sooner you can share the tools you are about to learn with another girl who may be feeling just like you do right now, who thinks she is all alone too and that her life is very hard to face. Because that’s what girls should be doing, right, lifting each other up with their encouragement and love.
I Am Who I Say I Am Growth Tips and Tools
1.Feelings: A temporary emotional state that comes and goes, sometimes happy, sometimes sad, sometimes full of anger, envy or even hate. Sometimes you’re on top of the world and sometimes you just want to sit around and cry. This is normal, all normal, however, you do have to live within your feelings. Living in them means really feeling them and recognizing that they are trying to tell you something, so listen to them and see if you can hear what they are trying to tell you.
Is the feeling trying to tell you that you are lonely, ugly, tired, apprehensive, frustrated, confused, heartbroken or disconnected? Because if it is then you need to listen up and figure out if those feelings are caused by a thought that is indeed true or just a belief that you’ve told yourself was true.
An example of this might be:
“I always feel so embarrassed when I have to wear shorts in gym class because all of the other girls look so good in shorts and I look so gross.”
Is that a truth or a belief? How do you know it is a truth?
You see when you stop to really think about it you will likely realize that it’s just you that believes it and that quite likely other girls in your gym class are having the same negative thought as you. These thoughts that go through your head like a tornado can be very powerful, so it is very important that we take a minute to really figure out if it is a truth or just a belief.
Tip: Is that feeling/thought a truth or just a belief? Take time to figure it out. Make a list of your beliefs and then decide which are true and which are just your beliefs.
2.Self-talk: the way we talk to ourselves has the greatest impact on us.
Girls so often talk to themselves in a negative way, a way that they would never talk to anyone else. Is that you? Do you tell yourself you are dumb, fat or that you are a terrible person? Can you imagine talking to a friend that way? No. You would never talk to a friend in a way that made them feel sad about themselves and you should never talk to yourself that way either, but that’s what we so often do and that is what we have to STOP doing. Think about what you would say to a friend if she told you that she wasn’t as pretty as other girls. I’m quite confident that you would encourage your friend, not put her down. You’d likely point out all the things you think are beautiful about your friend. Well, that is how you need to talk to yourself; like you would talk to your own best friend.
Tip: Write down five things that you like about yourself such as, I have beautiful hair, or I encourage others and I am a great listener or, I really like my smile.
Now print that on your mirror on in your journal or in your school binder and repeat it many times a day because even if you do not believe it right now, your subconscious mind believes everything you tell it, and your subconscious mind will soon have you believing it too.
3.Write down three affirmations. (Affirmations are strong, short, powerful statements that encourage you when the going gets tough.) Ex. I am a strong, confident person. I am calm and in control. I am unique and I love who I am. I can and I will get through this.
Affirmations are like a best friend who encourages you when you need it most. Remember, the more you repeat them, the more you will believe them.
Tip: Repeat one or all of your affirmations when you need some help through a challenging time.
4.Journal: Writing in a journal is a fantastic tool to help you recognize what is going well in your life or what isn’t.
Tip: Take time to write about what is bothering you most. Then read it over and see if it is a truth or just a belief.
Next, pick an affirmation that you can have ready to use when this worry is taking over your life and write it several times in your journal. You need to be ready to replace your negative thoughts with a positive affirmation. (You can find many awesome affirmations for girls on line.)
5.Use gratitude: You cannot be sad, worried, or any other negative emotion while you are practicing gratitude.
In your journal write about three things you are grateful for or as many things as you can think of that you are grateful for. This is a fantastic way to build on your self-confidence or self-esteem.
So, if you are not happy with the shape of your body, write about the other parts of your body you are grateful for, like your beautiful fingers that help you play piano, or your gorgeous, thick hair, or your smile that people are always complimenting you on.
Tip: Write down gratitude for the things you may not even believe you have but would like to have because this kind of gratitude just makes you happy to think about.
Ex. I am so grateful for my beautiful, strong legs and gym shorts.
There is always something to be grateful for.
6. Self-care: This is an easy way to remind yourself that you matter and that you are in control of your body, mind and spirit. It’s like telling your body you love and respect it.
Body: eat healthy food, exercise or take a walk in nature.
Mind: read a great book, listen to inspiring music, repeat a positive affirmation, take a nap.
Spirit: time to breathe and be in the moment, maybe through meditation or yoga.
Tip: Create a self-care plan so that it is ready to use when you need it most.
Remember, YOU ARE NOT ALONE, everyone is going through some sort of emotion right at this very moment and that’s normal, feelings cannot hurt you unless you let them. Using the information you have just read can help you get through your challenging thoughts of comparison, feelings of lack or just loneliness but you have to do the work and then you will see the magic happen. You will see and begin to believe that you truly are an amazing person, and that life is meant to be filled with happiness and when it isn’t you can use these tools to help you ride the waves of uncertainty that come with being a beautiful, strong, courageous, lovely girl. And don’t forget to share them with other girls because that’s how we grow and become an amazing tribe of beautiful, strong women.
Always Believe,
You Are Amazing!
Tammie
Need more inspiration? Check out my web page for other materials meant to lift and inspire you to live your very best life.
Smile. You’ve Got This! BELIEVE!